Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
