were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
