Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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