Plan B is the new Plan A
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
