OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Randomize
