He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
