He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
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