I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
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