Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
