It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Randomize