Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
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