is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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