My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize