Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
