As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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