i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
She bit a glass in half.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
