So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
