So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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