i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
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If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
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Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
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