ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
