Texts From Last Night

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  (314): View more from Missouri

  eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth

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  (314): eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth http://tfl.nu/8d45
  Replies (26) Good night (1008) Bad night (4712)
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  (905): View more from Ontario

  MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.

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  (905): MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it. http://tfl.nu/mzwz
  Replies (40) Good night (5462) Bad night (1571)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her

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  (407): we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her http://tfl.nu/n8un
  Replies (10) Good night (4850) Bad night (969)
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.

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  (859): Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke. http://tfl.nu/i77o
  Replies (8) Good night (784) Bad night (2563)
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  (209): View more from California

  I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside

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  (209): I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside http://tfl.nu/5a48
  Replies (3) Good night (1968) Bad night (984)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.

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  (360): I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now. http://tfl.nu/b1mw
  Replies (8) Good night (2842) Bad night (639)
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  (925): View more from California

  Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?

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  (925): Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm? http://tfl.nu/b5qs
  Replies (10) Good night (1688) Bad night (606)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.

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  (+44): She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs. http://tfl.nu/ojt0
  Replies (10) Good night (1552) Bad night (461)
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  (925): View more from California

  Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.

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  (925): Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious. http://tfl.nu/2nhd
  Replies (4) Good night (734) Bad night (1598)
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  (864): View more from South Carolina

  I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago

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  (864): I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago http://tfl.nu/uywq
  Replies (13) Good night (357) Bad night (1224)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha

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  (304): Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha http://tfl.nu/xonb
  Replies (1) Good night (784) Bad night (399)
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  (765): View more from Indiana

  Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.

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  (765): Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares. http://tfl.nu/7uu2
  Replies (4) Good night (944) Bad night (361)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake

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  (202): Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake http://tfl.nu/zcp7
  Replies (0) Good night (465) Bad night (284)
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.

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  (319): He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk. http://tfl.nu/n6v5
  Replies (0) Good night (377) Bad night (455)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.

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  (904): Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here. http://tfl.nu/5mlv
  Replies (1) Good night (496) Bad night (345)

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