Texts From Last Night

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  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance

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  (262): Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance http://tfl.nu/br4q
  Replies (4) Good night (1412) Bad night (1664)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.

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  (732): So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up. http://tfl.nu/tcvy
  Replies (2) Good night (1051) Bad night (885)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian

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  (415): i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian http://tfl.nu/vq1a
  Replies (8) Good night (1952) Bad night (895)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.

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  (617): he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant (617): then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him. http://tfl.nu/q2li
  Replies (6) Good night (881) Bad night (3738)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen

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  (630): True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen http://tfl.nu/yx2l
  Replies (18) Good night (1029) Bad night (4067)
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow

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  (941): so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow http://tfl.nu/gsjr
  Replies (15) Good night (3456) Bad night (646)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.

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  (585): So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag. http://tfl.nu/s1z9
  Replies (17) Good night (9146) Bad night (784)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice

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  (516): Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice http://tfl.nu/slww
  Replies (24) Good night (7180) Bad night (1509)
• Favorite

  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.

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  (902): So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge. http://tfl.nu/p9n1
  Replies (5) Good night (982) Bad night (2205)
• Favorite

  (778): View more from British Columbia

  You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.

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  (778): You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you. http://tfl.nu/kryn
  Replies (5) Good night (2573) Bad night (924)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.

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  (540): Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run. http://tfl.nu/gma4
  Replies (3) Good night (1926) Bad night (597)
• Favorite

  (786): View more from Florida

  If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok

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  (786): If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok http://tfl.nu/pfjn
  Replies (4) Good night (744) Bad night (2095)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"

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  (651): I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you" http://tfl.nu/co0c
  Replies (3) Good night (1202) Bad night (423)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.

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  (785): I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me. http://tfl.nu/wjzj
  Replies (2) Good night (785) Bad night (420)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.

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  (732): I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist. http://tfl.nu/ae21
  Replies (5) Good night (462) Bad night (1364)

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