Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
