am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Randomize
