is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
