What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
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