Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
