I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
