The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
