I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Do vagina's smell?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize