So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Randomize
