you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
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We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
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It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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