once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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