You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
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