PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
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