you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
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