I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
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