im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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