I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
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