he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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