I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Randomize
