If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Randomize
