who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
