I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize