I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I didn't notice because vodka
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
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