I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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