paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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