Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Randomize
