my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
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