judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize