I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
